Remembering

My mom and I were talking the other day. Labor Day weekend to be exact. It has been one year to the date when we had our family photos taken with my dad. It seems almost impossible that a year has passed, yet even more impossible that we are approaching the one year mark of his leaving us.



I was thinking about this time of year after my last post. I love how all of the beauty of fall surrounds you in so many forms. The color is the most dominant change for sure. The weather plays a huge part as well. I remember though. Exactly how the sun shone down and the crisp air required a skirt with a sweater instead of sleeveless. I remember how the leaves rustled upward in the sky as the wind set underneath them. I remember.

The year has been full of reminders of him. From resolutions, to newspaper articles, to football season. All reminders. It is good to remember. To reflect on all of the things that were so him. After he passed, for the longest time, all I could see was the bad stuff. How sick he was. How hard it was to know that he was no longer himself. Looking in those eyes and knowing it was him, but yet seeing this hollow life. I don't know if it is the shift in the season or just God's way of helping me heal. But lately, in the past few weeks, I haven't seen those visions. I feel certain that his death has left my head and finally entered my heart. Where it belongs and where it shall stay. Along with his passing comes all of the in between. I can finally put it all together and just...remember.

My girls remember too. They still talk about him. The Bear mostly. She saw the newspaper a couple of weeks ago and said immediately, "that's my Papaw." Yep, sweet girl, I told her. It sure is. The way I now remember him. Handsome and proud. Determined and strong. Loving and selfless.

We remember things for different reasons. I know that I will always feel him when the season shifts. When I see the leaves falling or blowing. When I go out in the morning and the crisp morning catches my breath. But, remembering is what makes people live on in our hearts forever. And for me, that is the most comforting and warm feeling. One that takes that chill away and makes the sun shine down just a little bit brighter.

Movin' Right Along

Being back at Ms. Tanya's is in one word, wonderful! The girls have settled right back into the routine and we are so happy. Pre-School is the best. Ms. Laura is doing an incredible job with the Bear and the Bean anxiously awaits next year when it will be her turn. With summer trailing behind, we have enjoyed it so much. I have to say though, this is by far my most favorite time of year. Everything is better with fall. Color, food and snuggles. Or maybe it isn't better, just more rich. Either way, we have welcomed it. Friends joined this weekend for campfires and play. While the air was a bit crisp, smiles warmed things nicely.



I don't seem to have much to write about lately. I don't know why. Things are certainly busy in our lives. Sometimes I think that you just get in a place of routine, one which takes over and you start to run on auto. I am ok with that for a little while. But, I can't stay that way for very long. I like changes and new challenges. I have seen such a shift in personality in these two lately. I don't know what or why, but everything is different. Their voices. Their laughs. Their arguing. Especially their arguing. Nothing is easy anymore Everything seems to be a competition. But, just like every other parenting challenge, I welcome it. I am, after all the one whom just stated they like new challenges, right? Andy says they are just like me. True. But, like him too. Which makes  for an interesting combo.

 

We look forward to a shift in the season, and with that bringing lot's of new ideas. Food, crafts, you name it. And most importantly, lot's of rich love.

Happy Week!